We all have our stories of our triumphs, failures, and the moments in-between. Mine is no more special than yours; but it answers a question that my friends often ask - even when they are not bold enough to ask me. "Why does she care so much about that Scott Weiland guy?"
Weiland is the singer/song writer most famously known for Stone Temple Pilots, and alternative rock group that has managed feats of success and creativity that many bands only hope for. Weiland also was part of Velvet Revolver, a short lived "super group" that also made their way up the charts, on the radio, and into the history books of music. And he has released two solo albums that defy genres.
So that is the liner notes on who Scott Weiland is, but why do I feel I owe him a lot? This guy that I have never met?
We all have those moments of crystal clarity, a giant turning point in our live and the way we view the word. I owe mine to Weiland and Stone Temple Pilots.
In retrorespect I was a protected middle class kid. Not in the sense that the world was censored, or by any fault of my parents - it is just the bubble I grew up in. We had our ups and downs, but the "Jones'" around us seemed perfect, especially to "kid" me that didn't know better. My dad worked too much, he could mean, he could be cruel, and he could be so absent. With a turbulent household nearing divorce, money being used as a weapon by my dad, my middle school years weren't as bright and shinny as I was long told they would be. (I swear this is the short version.)
Music was always around me, in the car, on the radio... But somehow it seemed like noise that belonged and I never stopped to really listen. That changed while I was on a bus, a school trip halfway around the world. So much of that trip is blurry, but this one moment is so clear that it is only a testament to how important it is to my life, and my adult worldview. I had a portable CD player with me, looked through my CDs and decided to play No 4 by STP. I had played it before, but never listened to it. Out of boredom I pulled out the liner notes and read along. As I focused on the honest lyrics about losing love, addiction, pain, and longing, it shook me out of my bubble. Sure I had seen movies about pain, had friends have bad things happen, watched tragedies on the news, but it never busted my bubble like this did. For the first time I got it - I understood that even at its worst my life was good, that I was lucky.
Those songs where a channel for me to experience someone else's tribulations - and that experience has made me a better person.
I still follow Weiland, his music, and sometimes the chaos that comes with it. I experience all music differently because of him, and experience the world differently because of him.